Bah! Humbug.
The holidays can be such a complicated time emotionally: while they are often portrayed and presented as joyous, replete with family gatherings and festive celebrations, the reality for many is far from this picture-perfect ideal. For those suffering from anxiety, depression, or loneliness, the season may feel isolating, overwhelming, or even downright painful. These feelings are not at all uncommon, and it's important to acknowledge that they are valid. Putting on a happy face or denying your feelings will not make them disappear; in fact, they usually grow stronger. Permit yourself to sit with your feelings and begin to work through them. Writing in a journal, meditation, or reaching out to a trusted friend or therapist can bring much-needed release and perspective. Remember, you don't have to go through this season alone or in silence.
The best way to handle holiday stress, one may find, is setting realistic expectations. With great societal and cultural pressures, making "perfect" holiday moments is a far-reaching expectation, an illusion of sorts. In actual fact, you really do not have to go to every single event, nor do you have to give expensive gifts or even celebrate conventionally if it's just not something that feels joyful for you. Give yourself permission to scale down, simplifying to what will feel meaningful and manageable for you. That might mean forgoing the big family dinner to be home, alone in your own home, and giving gifts of handmade things rather than things you find in expensive stores. Letting what's meaningful to you be the priority rather than what is expected can make this time much less stressful.
Take a little extra care of your mental and physical needs over the holidays. It's easy to let self-care slide when things get hectic, but this is one of those times that taking care of your needs is more vital than ever. Work small yet profound habits into your daily life, like a brisk walk in nature, deep breathing, or time for your favorite hobby. A regular night's sleep and wholesome food can work wonders, too. Let the comfort of small things-a warm blanket, an old movie, a cup of hot tea-soothe your mind and body when you need it most.
Holiday routines for some can be hurtful in memories and feelings. If that feels like you, consider starting new routines reflecting your present needs and soothing you.
Whether it's baking cookies, binge-watching one's favorite series, or volunteering at a local charity, you have the right to design a holiday that feels right for you. Volunteering is more than transformative; not only does it help other people in need, but the contact can also leave one's soul healed from inside due to a sense of meaning and connection.
Loneliness can be especially heavy during the holidays. Isolation can be hard; reaching out to others can make all the difference. It does not have to mean going to big gatherings; sometimes, it is just that phone call or virtual meetup that can help a person get the connection they need. If it's too hard to reach out, join a community locally or online where your interests are represented, and meet people. Knowing you're not alone in how you feel can be a great comfort. Social media can amplify such feelings of loneliness or inadequacy. Scrolling through seemingly perfect holiday posts can make you feel like you're missing out or not doing enough. What you have to remember is that what you see online is often a curated highlight reel, not an accurate depiction of reality. Taking time off from social media, or even taking a break, can help with protecting your mental health and focusing on what's truly important.
For those especially challenging moments in life when dark thoughts appear, coping mechanisms are needed. When such thoughts strike, remind yourself that however heavy those feelings may seem, they will pass with time. Grounding techniques anchor you in the present moment.
Try deep breathing, notice your surroundings, and name five things you can see, or hold onto something comforting like a warm mug of tea or soft blanket to connect back with your senses. A comforting routine can provide solace: light a candle, play soothing music, or write your feelings down in a journal to let go of them in your mind.
If the loneliness becomes too much to bear, don't be afraid to reach out to someone, whether it be a friend, a hotline, or an online community. Just to hear another voice and sometimes share your thoughts with them can be a great deal. Remember, asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness.
Another strong way of flipping your mindset over the holidays could be the practice of gratitude. There are always, even in the worst of times, those small moments or things one can be thankful for: a warm meal, a kind gesture, or even just a moment of quiet peace. Jotting these down or reflecting each day on what those things were helps cultivate hope and a resilient mind. And finally, when the feelings of anxiety or depression are overwhelming, it is time to seek professional help. Therapists and counselors can give you tools and strategies tailored to your situation and provide support when you most need it. There is no shame in reaching out-in fact, it is one of the bravest steps you can take toward healing. As the holidays pass, remind yourself that this is a season, not a lifetime.
Plan something to look forward to in the new year, whether it's a small trip, a new hobby, or setting a personal goal. Having something exciting on the horizon can help make the holiday season feel less daunting. While the holidays may not always look or feel perfect, you have the power to navigate this time with grace, authenticity, and self-compassion.
By prioritizing your mental health, setting boundaries, and finding moments of connection, you can create a holiday experience that honors your unique needs. Above all, know that you are worthy of peace, joy, and love-not just during the holidays but every day of the year. You are not alone, and brighter days are ahead.